one of my favorite things about being a metalhead in 2016 is trying to identify my own categorical imperatives for my taste in metal, and then seeing if i can't smash them to bits.  metal is a supersaturated mode of music.  for all its orthodoxy cultishness and pomp, there are exceptions for nearly every single rule.  finding those exceptions for one's own personal tastes is where things can get especially fun, i find.  pick something to identify as a rule that you would want to stick to hard and fast with regard to your tastes, and the more bands you listen to, the more likely you are to hear a group that shatters your expectations.  start a sentence with, "i hate", insert a musical qualifier, end the sentence with, "in metal."  you're highly likely to find a band that does that thing that you hate so well that you almost have to hand it to them.  i hate triggered drums, but wow, guttural secrete.  i hate stuck-pig vocals, but wow, wormed.  i hate bands that are complete clones of portal, but wow, altarage.  i hate bands who use drums that sound so fake that you're left wondering why they even try to approximate a drum sound and don't just embrace the fake sounding percussion sound all together, but wow, shrine of insanibilis.  (a lot of my personal categorical imperatives have to do with drums).  i hate bands that sound so over-rehearsed that their recordings seemingly lack any blood sweat and tears on a human level, but wow, meshuggah.  i hate bands with such a shitty guitar tone that i wonder if they would have been better off if they just plugged their guitar directly into their computer instead of even bothering to use an amp since they clearly chose such a weak sounding amp sound, but wow, vassafor.  i hate bands that take that whole aesthetic of making their recording sound so bad that it seems to be trying to approximate the sound of being recorded in your mom's basement on one microphone straight to an old worn out cassette, but wow, volahn.  i hate histrionics and veiled identities and posturing, but wow, batushka.  i hate terrible bass guitar tone, but wow, ...almost every metal band.  you get the idea.  irkallian oracle might just break something inside your mind.  

_alibi